My husband has sunk into a deep depression since we separated
DEAR DEIDRE: SINCE my husband and I separated, he has sunk into a deep depression.
All I want is for him to come home to me and our children, but I don’t know how to help him.
I’m 42 and he’s 44. We’ve been married for 10 years.
We were having some problems and, last year, had a huge row which culminated in a joint decision to split.
He moved out into a bedsit. I realised I wanted to try again with our marriage and told him.
He says he still loves me and doesn’t want a divorce but he doesn’t feel ready to come home.
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Since he left, he’s gone rapidly downhill mentally.
He used to see the children at home once a week, but has stopped. I can’t send them there because his place is too small and dirty.
He isn't eating properly, and is so withdrawn and miserable - a shadow of himself.
I’m worried about the effect on our kids.
My daughter, seven, just wants her daddy back.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: I know you want your husband back home, but it doesn’t sound like he’s in the right frame of mind for this to happen at the moment.
He needs to get his depression diagnosed and treated, so it’s important that he sees his GP.
My support pack on Depression has lots of useful advice and information.
Make it clear you’re there for him because you care, but don’t put any pressure on him.
Explain to your children that their dad isn’t well but still loves them.