MOVING ON
Working with my ex makes it awkward to ask new colleague on a date
My heart pumps whenever she walks into the room
I’M desperate to ask out my colleague, but I also work with my ex-partner.
I’m a man in my forties and was with my ex for five years.
We’re still friends, and I enjoy working with her, but I have a huge crush on my colleague, who’s a year or two younger than me.
My heart pumps whenever she walks into the room, and I’m desperate to take her out for dinner.
But I’m worried that if I do, it will cause unnecessary bitterness between me and my ex.
I don’t want anything to be awkward at work. What should I do?
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MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: It was inevitable that one of you would move on eventually.
You don’t need to say anything to your ex, but to help maintain a respectful relationship you could quietly let her know you like someone and are thinking about asking them out.
Then she can prepare herself. You don’t need to tell her who it is but it would be considerate to keep any blossoming romance low key to allow everyone to adjust.
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