Even though my boyfriend has a lover, he can’t handle me having one too
DEAR DEIDRE: EVEN though my boyfriend refuses to stop sleeping with his lover, he can’t handle the reality of me seeing someone else.
I’m 46, he’s 50 and we’ve been together for three years.
We’ve always had an amazing sex life, but it’s never been enough for him.
He’s a self-proclaimed sex addict and in the past year has started bedding someone else. He told me that his urges were becoming too much to handle and he needed to find an outlet.
As he’s been honest about it, he’s convinced himself that it’s OK, and while it’s broken my heart, I’ve foolishly put up with it because I love him.
Recently I took matters into my own hands and started dating a lovely man on the side. The only problem is my boyfriend freaked out when he found out and insisted I stop seeing him.
He told me I was being disloyal and is now refusing to talk to me.
How can’t he see that he’s acting like a complete hypocrite?
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: Your boyfriend wants his cake and to eat it too, but clearly can’t cope with you doing the same. If you are unhappy then you don’t have to go along with it just to please him.
By the sounds of it, you would be better off ending things so that you can open yourself up to the possibility of meeting someone who is 100 per cent about you and will fully commit.
My support pack Ending A Relationship will help you have this conversation.