I forgave cheating partner but my daughter won’t invite him to her wedding
DEAR DEIDRE: I FORGAVE my partner for cheating but my daughter can’t, so he’s not invited to her wedding.
I’m a 60 year-old woman and I’m divorced.
My partner is 62 and he’s always been a ladies’ man.
He travels for his job and when I caught chlamydia, I knew he’d cheated.
He said it was a one-off when he met somebody in a bar one night and he was offered sex on a plate.
He was horrified that he’d caught something and passed it on to me.
We had some counselling and I forgave him as he was full of remorse and was worried he was going to lose me.
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I don’t think he’ll be doing that again any time soon.
I was very upset at the time and I’m close to my daughter.
She’s 35 and she got it out of me about the cheating.
She says she doesn’t want anything more to do with him.
Her wedding is in February and she wants me to give her away.
She doesn’t speak to her father as he let her down as a kid.
She’s been clear that she doesn’t want my partner to come. It makes it so difficult for me.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: Now is not the time to insist that your partner is invited to your daughter’s wedding.
If you confront your daughter about it and she gets upset, it could damage your relationship with her.
Talk to your partner. Ask him to accept that he won’t be going to her wedding but you still want to support and give her away.
It’s her special day after all.
Explain you want to focus on rebuilding their relationship after she ties the knot.
Then you can suggest they have some family mediation so that they can at least be civil.
Contact National Family Mediation (, 0300 4000 636) for help.
