How do I let down my best friend?

DEAR DEIDRE: When I moved back to my hometown I was so excited to finally reconnect with my best friend – until I found out she had become utterly obsessed with spirituality.

Now she is constantly trying to meet, but I don’t know how to let her down gently.

I’m 62, she’s 63 and we used to be great friends when we lived on the same street 30 years ago.

Over the years we lost touch but since I decided to move home to be closer to my family after a divorce, I thought it was a great idea to reach out.

However, when we met for coffee I realised how much she’d changed.

She gushed about being pagan and told me all about her crystal collection.

When I visited her house her walls were filled with tapestries and the place stank of incense.

Now she keeps pressuring me to come to her spiritual groups to meet new friends.

I can’t cope with the idea of being friends with people obsessed with make believe. What should I do?

DEIDRE SAYS: While it’s uncomfortable, in these situations it’s better to be honest and up front.

You don’t have to be unkind, but let her know that spiritual groups aren’t really your style.

Let her know you’re trying out other groups that are more you.

As your beliefs don’t align, it would be futile for either of you to try and force a close friendship.

Instead let her know you’d still like to see her for coffee every now and again.

See if keeping things simple works for you.

If not, over time try to dissipate the contact.

I’m sure she will take the hint.