I’ve never been the same since I was in a car crash
DEAR DEIDRE: Cocaine addiction is ruining everything and I am constantly reminded of my debts.
All I do is dream of living a normal life again. I’m 31, single and work in the City.
I was introduced to cocaine when I started my job on the trading floor.
Many of the guys there are users because the pressure is so much.
We work hard and then want to play hard.
I don’t think I have ever recovered from my brother’s death.
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He was driving and I was in the passenger seat when a van drove straight into us.
I was 19 then and was depressed for a long time. Only people from my childhood know about what happened and I don’t like to talk about it any more.
Taking cocaine lets me forget my troubles but it has also made me run into financial problems.
I now have dealers asking me for money then dangling the carrot of more drugs to score a hit. It’s a treadmill of misery.
I called a helpline and they asked me if I felt suicidal. When I said no, they didn’t seem very interested in helping me kick the habit.
Can you help me in any way?
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: If you can find bereavement help, you may discover you don’t need the crutch of drugs.
Contact support charity Sue Ryder (sueryder.org, 0808 164 4572) which offers six weeks of free bereavement counselling.
Also find help through wearewithyou.org.uk, which supports people who are addicted to drugs and alcohol.
If you can start to recognise the pattern that leads to you using, then change that routine. You can break the cycle of abuse.
As for your workmates and cocaine, think about going to the gym or meeting other friends who are not keen on taking drugs.