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Baby blues

My son is overloaded whilst his wife swans off to see her sister-in-law

DEAR DEIDRE: My son’s partner keeps swanning off to see her sister-in-law who has just had a baby.

It means he is left doing everything in the home for their two daughters, who are nine and seven.

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My son works for the rail network and he normally gets lots of overtime but he can’t do that at the moment.

His partner is 33 and she works one day a week in an office. My son is 37 and the strain is beginning to show.

He cooks, cleans and has to do the school run in the morning. I’m the girls’ grandma and I’m 62 and I have them after school until he gets home.

He has started to look stressed and I’m worried that the girls will be affected.

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My son’s partner stays with her sister-in-law four nights a week.

As a new mum she is struggling and lonely, apparently.

I’m concerned that their finances are taking a hit and their girls are being affected.

The older one has talked about “Mummy and Daddy shouting”.

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I don’t want to interfere. It’s not my business but I do want to help if I can.

DEIDRE SAYS: Tell your son you’re there for him if he needs to talk or if things aren’t going well in his relationship.

Your daughter-in-law may be visiting her sister-in-law to allow some space in her relationship with your son if they are having problems.

If it is because her sister-in-law is lonely, being there for half the week isn’t encouraging her to get out and find new friends.

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She could link up with people in similar situations through the National Childbirth Trust (nct.org.uk, 0300 330 0700).

If she has post-natal depression she should see her GP. Pandas Foundation (pandas foundation.org.uk, 0808 1961 776) can help too.

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