I am scared to ditch my sponging boyfriend – he would have nothing left
DEAR DEIDRE: MY boyfriend treats me like his personal bank and I’m sick of it – but I can’t leave him because he’d have nowhere to go.
We’re both 33 and have been together for four years. Our relationship is pretty rubbish. We don’t have fun or talk.
We spend the evenings sitting on the sofa, looking at our own laptops or phones and barely speaking.
As for sex, that has never been great. We rarely do it and, when we do, there’s no snogging or foreplay.
It’s all over in a few minutes from start to finish. I don’t orgasm and I’ve given up pretending.
The problem is, he is awful with money and has no savings.
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He runs out of cash before the end of the month, so he borrows from me.
He says he’ll pay me back, but of course he never does.
I can’t end the relationship because he wouldn’t cope alone.
DEIDRE SAYS: You’re trapped in an unhappy relationship and you deserve so much more.
While it’s natural that you worry about your boyfriend’s welfare, he’s an adult –and you’re not his mum.
He’s taking advantage of your kindness. Don’t let him emotionally blackmail you into staying.
Speak to him and tell him how you feel. He may get a wake-up call.
If nothing changes, my support pack Ending A Relationship may help you.
Try talking to a friend or relative who can help you be objective.