Sex with my hot new lover is amazing but I feel really bad for my ex
DEAR DEIDRE: SEX with my new boyfriend is so amazing, it makes me feel really bad for my ex.
Even though we got together at school, my ex and I never had sex.
He’d be gutted to know things work so well in bed with someone else.
I’m 23 and my ex is 25. My new boyfriend is 27.
My ex and I were together for five years but we both remained virgins.
Every time we tried to have sex, either he couldn’t stay hard or it was too painful when he attempted to penetrate me. In the end we gave up trying.
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I thought I must be frigid.
The relationship eventually fell apart but we decided to stay friends.
Just a few weeks later, I met my friend’s older brother at a wedding and we fell for each other instantly.
I was very scared to have sex with him, but when I finally did, everything happened naturally. He was so patient with me and it feels so good.
My ex doesn’t know I’m in a new relationship. He has been single since we split, and probably thinks I am too.
I feel guilty about how quickly I met my new partner and I feel even worse about the fantastic sex we are having.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: Sadly, not all relationships will work out, however much a couple love each other.
Even though you were with your ex for a long time and it’s lovely that you still care about his feelings, you are entitled to move on.
You have nothing to feel guilty about. You didn’t plan to meet someone so soon.
For what-ever reason, you and your ex weren’t sexually compatible.
It’s likely nerves affected you both, so that sexual responses became blocked.
Enjoy the great sex you’re now having, you deserve it. You could gently tell your ex you’ve met someone new, but spare him the details.
