Jump directly to the content
WORK CRUSH

I’m head over heels for my colleague but he isn’t ready for a relationship

DEAR DEIDRE: I’VE developed feelings for a colleague and although we’ve been out a few times, it is unrequited.

I work for a building company doing interior design. I’m a woman of 32. He’s one of the project managers and he’s 35.

I really liked him when we met but I kept things professional until we worked together.

He messaged me to ask if I was on social media and found me straight away. I was delighted.

We started texting, saying good morning to one another and then things got more flirty.

We met up for a couple of dates and on our third date, I told him about my feelings but he said that he was having some counselling and not ready for a relationship.

Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team

Every problem gets a personal reply from one of our trained counsellors.

Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.

You can also send a private message on the Facebook page.

He said he was working on himself which I took in my stride.

He’s continued to chat but he’s like an old friend. I checked his social media and he was tagged in a photograph by another woman.

I did a bit of online stalking and realised he had liked every single post she’s ever done. He’s never liked any of my posts.

This morning I woke up to a, “Morning sweetheart. Good luck with your presentation – thinking of you x.”

It’s now been eight months.

Do I continue to talk to him?

MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE

DEIDRE SAYS: Tell him that you would like to know where you stand. Give yourself a time limit of say, a month.

If he doesn’t step forward by then, find somebody who is more deserving of your time. My support pack called Finding The Right Partner For You will help. 

My feeling is this isn’t going to happen. He may have unrequited love with the woman on Facebook, or perhaps he isn’t interested in a relationship at all.

He’s enjoying a flirty friendship online with you and perhaps that’s all he will ever offer.

Topics