My best friend is only around when he needs something and this time it’s money
DEAR DEIDRE: THESE days my best friend is only around when he needs something from me and this time it’s money.
He’s 28, I’m 29 and we’ve been friends since we were in school.
Growing up we were so close. We did everything together.
However, in recent years he has had less and less time for me.
He disappears but always reappears when he needs support or someone to hang out with.
I’ve always tried to give him the benefit of the doubt but this year he forgot to wish me a happy birthday and didn’t so much as message me when I lost my mum.
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Now he has popped back up to ask if he can borrow £300 to pay his electricity bill.
I know he wouldn’t ask unless he was desperate, and while a part of me wants to help, I feel so betrayed.
DEIDRE SAYS: A real friend is someone that you can rely on, who shows up for you. Not just when they need something.
Find a moment to speak with him about your feelings.
If nothing changes you would be better off focusing on your other friends and spending less time with him.
My support pack, Standing Up For Yourself, will help you talk to him without causing a row.
Remember you are not obliged to lend him money. You can simply say that you can’t afford to bail him out again and leave it at that.
