Every time I come close to losing my virginity I freeze
DEAR DEIDRE: I’VE had many opportunities to lose my virginity but every time I seem to freeze.
I am a man of 23. I try to convince myself it is because of my weight or my personality, but these problems do not seem to bother anyone else.
For some reason, I am afraid of affection and intimacy with women.
I’m ashamed when friends ask how many people I have been with and I end up lying.
I am starting to become a nervous wreck.
Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team
Every problem gets a personal reply from one of our trained counsellors.
Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.
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DEIDRE SAYS: There are plenty of virgins older than you. They just don’t shout about it.
Don’t see women and sex as just a commodity or something to brag about.
Aim for a caring relationship first, then deciding to have sex will be less anxiety-ridden.
Read my support pack First Time Fears.
If being emotionally close to a woman is scary for you, that may be as a result of difficult relationships in your own family.
You will be able to find help through The Mix (, 0808 808 4994), who help under-25s
