I’ve become my partners babysitter – I wouldn’t mind but we never have sex
DEAR DEIDRE: MY partner sees me as a glorified babysitter for his daughter.
She visits us every other weekend, often while my partner is working in his key-cutting shop.
She’s seven and she’s a good kid and gets along well with my nine-year-old son.
My problem is that my partner doesn’t seem interested in me. He kisses me hello and goodbye but we’ve never had sex.
He is 45 and I’m 40. We don’t live together. He lives a mile away from me.
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He comes over two or three evenings a week and I have his daughter while he works and he catches up with us all afterwards.
I feel used. He never shows any signs of wanting to move in, let alone marry me.
DEIDRE SAYS: It’s natural to want a complete relationship with somebody but he’s not getting the message.
Ask where he sees your future and why he doesn’t want a sex life.
He may not realise that you’re feeling taken for granted where his daughter is concerned either but he needs to know.
Suggest you find help through a couple counsellor via the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (, 01455 883300).
