My friend cheats on his girlfriend with me but denies being bisexual

DEAR DEIDRE: WILL the guy I’m in love with ever admit that he likes men and leave his girlfriend for me?

I’m 24 and a gay man.

My “friend” is 25 and claims he’s straight, even though he asks me to give him oral sex whenever we meet.

We’ve been doing this for months and I’m starting to think he’s stringing me along.

He’s been living with his girlfriend, 23, for three years.

I’ve known him for years and I could see myself in a relationship with him. But he won’t ever give me oral sex in return.

He says this would make him bisexual, which he isn’t. He’s in denial.

Sometimes, I feel I should tell his girlfriend what’s been going on, so he has to admit the truth, but I know that would be wrong.

Am I being foolish?

DEIDRE SAYS: Telling his girlfriend would only hurt her and destroy their relationship.

It wouldn’t make him want to be with you. In fact, he’d probably turn against you.

You can’t “out” someone else.

If he’s not willing or ready to admit he enjoys sex with men as well as women, that is his business. But this unfair situation is hurting you.

You want a full relationship, and reciprocal sex.

You’d be better off looking for someone who is open about their sexuality and is available.

My support pack on Moving On may be helpful.