My girlfriend always uses her self-diagnosed social anxiety as an excuse when she lets me down
DEAR DEIDRE: MY girlfriend reckons she has social anxiety. She is self-diagnosed and it’s always her excuse when she lets me down.
I’m 23 and she’s 24. I was diagnosed with anxiety by my doctor two years ago.
Soon afterwards, she announced she has exactly the same condition.
I struggle with socialising but I make myself go because I don’t want the anxiety to win.
She hardly goes out now and mostly stays in gaming.
But how can she have anxiety when she’s been out all day with a gaming friend?
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It seems very convenient to me.
I’m wondering if it’s all simply a convenient excuse because she can’t be bothered to make the effort with me any more.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Well done for facing your anxiety and pushing against it.
By facing your fears you will build your resilience and ensure anxiety does not completely take over your life.
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Your girlfriend may be soaking up your worries and may genuinely be feeling some anxiety.
You would both benefit from counselling. There is also a great charity to help you called Anxiety UK (, 03444 775 774).