My partner says that if I don’t slim, he’ll leave me – but I think it’s OK to be big
DEAR DEIDRE: IF I don’t slim down, my partner says he’ll leave me.
When we met I was 13st, but my weight has always fluctuated and, after we got together, I piled the pounds back on. I’m now 16st.
I’m 27 and have a three-year-old son from a previous relationship.
My partner is 30. We met two years ago.
He talks about how good I used to look and questions why I think it’s OK to be so big and why I can’t change.
I’ve tried every diet. The weight comes off but just as quickly goes back on.
I went through a very violent and toxic relationship with my son’s biological father.
He fat-shamed me to the point I hated myself.
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I didn’t want to be here but pulled myself out of that for my son and began to love my body again.
I don’t any more, though. I feel pressured and sad when I’m hungry.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Overeating is about finding comfort from hurtful feelings.
I’m concerned you’re with a man who demoralises you.
You can do so much better.
There’s someone out there who will encourage and support you, but it’s not him.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
Get healthy by focusing on eating and exercising well. My support pack End Weight Worries will help.
But do it for you, not a partner.