My work pals think I’m having an affair with a married older woman but I’m not

DEAR DEIDRE: EVEN though my best friend at work is 28 years my senior, everyone think we are having an affair.

I’m a 23-year-old guy and a teaching assistant at a secondary school. She’s a married science teacher of 51.

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We used to get on really well and eat lunch together most days. But a month ago some students saw us eating together in her classroom.

They’ve started spreading gossip that they saw us kissing and, worse, our colleagues have even joined in the teasing in the staff room.

We used to talk all the time but she keeps her distance now.

She’s leaving at the end of this year and I want to stay in touch and be friends.

But when I mention it to her, she gives vague replies. I reckon she thinks I fancy her but I don’t.

If anything, I see her like a mum, especially as mine lives abroad.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Reassure her that you see your friendship as just platonic and seek nothing more.

This may make her feel more at ease around you.

Respect her space and make sure you mix with the rest of the staff so she feels less under the spotlight.

When she leaves, you can say that if she ever fancies a coffee, you’d like a catch-up but leave the decision with her.

Again, this will help her feel less under pressure and more relaxed in your friendship.

If she opts to end the friendship, don’t feel this is a reflection on you.

As a married woman, she knows what her husband would and would not be comfortable with.