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TAKEN FOR GRAN-TED

My daughter loves her granny more than me – I don’t get a look in

DEAR DEIDRE: MY seven-year-old daughter is so close to my mum-in-law that it hurts.

She sleeps in her grandma’s bed. My mum-in-law plaits her hair, reads her stories and bathes her too.

I get so frustrated and sometimes shout at my mother-in-law
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I get so frustrated and sometimes shout at my mother-in-law

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I don’t get a look in. I get so frustrated and sometimes shout at my mother-in-law.

I am 36 and my husband is 42.

We moved in with his mum during lockdown when the house we were buying fell through.

I told him I wasn’t happy with our living arrangements and he said he would find us a house.

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But my mother-in-law told me I can’t move because my daughter would suffer and miss her too much.

I don’t have a say in anything. I don’t know what to do or who to turn to.

DEIDRE SAYS: It’s easy to see your daughter’s closeness to her grandma as a competition.

The bond between grandparents and grandchildren can be special.

There should be no issue with you reminding your mum-in-law of the boundaries.

Could you tell her you will be doing bedtime unless you ask for help? There is room in your daughter’s life for both of you.

Talk to your husband when you are on your own and ask to look for your own place.

Your mum-in-law can still play an important role but your family needs its own space.

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