BABY SHOCK

Daughter is pregnant with bipolar boyfriend’s baby and I am worried for her

DEAR DEIDRE: I WAS devastated to learn my teenage daughter is pregnant.

Her boyfriend is bipolar and their relationship is far from stable.

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I don't think my daughter or her boyfriend are ready to be parents

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She had dreams of going to college and studying to be a paediatric nurse.

She’s bright and was on track for good grades. Now I worry she’s thrown all of that away.

She’s 18, as is her boyfriend. She says she wants to keep the baby but I’m trying to explain to her how this will turn her life upside-down.

I’m her 53-year-old mother. She is two months pregnant and has been with this guy for the past two years.

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I don’t think either of them are ready to be parents.

Her boyfriend often has manic or depressive episodes. Surely adding a baby into the mix won’t help?

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I know I shouldn’t hold that against him but he’s not who I imagined my daughter ending up with.

We have tried to warn her how tough this will be. But she won’t listen to me or her father.

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DEIDRE SAYS: You want to protect your daughter – that is natural – but she is a young adult and while you might not agree with her choices, it is her body and her life.

Better to listen and support her rather than tell her what to do, which is likely to end up with her resenting you.

I am sending you my pack, Unplanned Pregnancy, which explains where she can get support with her choices.

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