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SMOKE AND MIRRORS

My partner spends £250 a week on cigarettes but complains he has no money

DEAR DEIDRE: MY partner spends £250 a week on cigarettes but then moans he doesn’t have any money.

He doesn’t contribute anything to our bills, so I’m left with nothing at the end of the month.

His behaviour feels so selfish and unfair
1
His behaviour feels so selfish and unfair

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He’s 37 and I’m 34. We’ve been together for three years.

I do love him and he’s not a bad person, but his behaviour feels so selfish and unfair.

I never get to spend ­anything on myself and I can’t save money either.

He seems to think that cigarettes are a necessity because he can’t manage without them, so I should be understanding.

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I earn more than him but that’s partly because he doesn’t try to get a better job.

I’ve talked to him about this, and even said I wanted him to move out if things didn’t improve, but he didn’t take me seriously.

DEIDRE SAYS: Your partner is acting like a child. He expects you to support him, while he spends his money on his unhealthy addiction.

You need to make it clear that either he ­contributes his fair share or you want him to leave.

My support pack, Standing Up For Yourself, should help.

Giving up smoking would improve both his health and your relationship. Suggest he contacts Quit (, 0800 00 22 00) for support.

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