I can’t stop my steamy co-worker affair even though my hubby gave me a second chance
DEAR DEIDRE: I KEEP going back for sex with my lover even though I know I’ll lose my husband if he finds out – again.
My husband gave me a second chance when he discovered our affair the first time, and he warned me there wouldn’t be a third.
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He’s 32, I’m 28 and we’ve been married for six years.
You could say it’s been short and not-so-sweet. Since we tied the knot, all we’ve done is argue.
At the start of last year, a new guy joined the PR agency I work for. He’s 34. He was a massive flirt and we got on really well.
Nothing happened for a long time, but during the pandemic, we grew closer. We were on Zoom a lot to talk about work, but slowly the conversations became more personal.
One evening, he offered to pick me up for a late-night drive. My husband had gone to a friend’s for a few pints in the garden, so I agreed.
We parked up and started chatting about our relationships. We both admitted we were sexually drawn to one another — and before I knew it we were scrambling into the back seat and ripping off each other’s clothes.
The sex was incredible. My husband has never made me climax, but my lover did twice.
We carried on sneaking around for months. The whole time my husband thought I was meeting my girlfriends. But in January, he noticed a love bite on my neck, which I hadn’t seen.
He guessed straight away who I’d been sleeping with. He knew we were friendly as I’d mentioned him quite a bit.
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He told me it was over and went to stay with a friend. But after a couple of weeks of begging, he agreed to give me one final chance.
I left my job and planned to have no contact with this guy.
But a couple of months ago, he got back in touch. It wasn’t long before we were back to the old routine.
I just can’t stop going back there. The sex is too good, and he makes me feel wanted.
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DEIDRE SAYS: These things always have a habit of coming out, so you need to put a stop to it.
This guy is giving you the attention you so desperately crave from your husband – so until you fix the issues in your marriage, you will continue to be tempted to go back.
Start communicating with your husband in the bedroom about what works for you. Improving your sex life is key to improving your marriage.
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I’m sending you my support pack Saving Your Sex Life. Relationship counselling will also help bring you two closer.
Contact Tavistock Relationships ().