I had sex with my art tutor before she was my teacher
DEAR DEIDRE: I HAD sex with my art tutor before I began studying at the college where she teaches. Now I can’t get her off my mind.
She is 38, I’m a woman of 21.
For more advice from Dear Deidre
No issue is too small, too large or too embarrassing. Read our personal replies here.
When I applied to my art college I had no idea who would teach me as I was interviewed by the head of admissions.
To say it was awkward when I was put in her tutor group is an understatement.
She’s a good friend of my older sister, and sometimes pops in or joins our social occasions.
Two years ago my sister organised a girls’ night at our house.
Everyone got way too drunk and ended up leaving early. In the end, it was just me and this friend left to clear up.
We had been getting on well, but once we were left alone it turned into serious flirting.
I was washing up, when I felt her hands on my hips. I turned to look at her and we ended up kissing.
Before long, she was unbuttoning my dress and touching me all over.
We ended up having sex on the sofa.
Afterwards we met a few times and shared a few heated kisses but we only had sex once more. Things fizzled out between us.
Get in touch in Deidre
Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.
Send an email to [email protected]
Or private message us via the Facebook page.
We change all personal details in our published stories to protect your identity.
A few days before my course started, she messaged me explaining “I’ve got my new register — I’m your new tutor.”
I tried to change classes but was told it was too late, so now we’re stuck seeing each other every week.
We know we can’t be together, but that hasn’t stopped us flirting.
I’ve got one more year of my course to go but I don’t know how I’ll get through that without falling for the temptation of sex with her.
Most read in Dear Deidre
DEIDRE SAYS: There is still a lot of sexual chemistry between you – no doubt because you both know any relationship is forbidden fruit.
Remember your relationship fizzled out naturally so most likely it would again – once the initial novelty had worn off.
Some universities and colleges have outright bans on staff/student relationships and most strongly discourage them, so your friend could risk losing her job.
Ask your college again if you can be moved into another tutor group. They must have capacity to make these adjustments where needed.
READ MORE SUN STORIES
And put as much distance in between the two of you as possible.
You didn’t do anything wrong by having a fling with your tutor before you were at college but things could get difficult if you pick up where you left off while studying together.