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My husband spends money on sex sites while I think of ways to reboot our love life

DEAR DEIDRE:  WHILE I was fretting over ways to reboot our sex life, my husband was spending money on sex sites.

I am 55 and he is 57. He had trouble getting an erection and says he went on sex sites to see if it helped.

My husband has been spending money on sex sites while I think of ways to reboot sex life
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My husband has been spending money on sex sites while I think of ways to reboot sex lifeCredit: Getty Images - Getty

I’d understand if he looked at porn but talking to and watching a girl hurts deeply.

He wants to forget it and move on but if he touches me, all I can think of is how disgusting it must be for him after looking at gorgeous twentysomethings who know how to excite a man.

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DEIDRE SAYS: You need to hear him say sorry but keep reminding yourself he is no spring chicken and women on sex sites are just acting roles for the money.

Men panic if they can’t get an erection. He was trying to make himself feel better and boost his confidence through the sex sites, not replace you.

He wanted to switch on the sexual-pleasure part of his brain, not redirect his emotions.

My e-leaflet Solving Erection Problems explains self-help ways you can resolve his problem together but insist he sees his GP in case there is an underlying medical issue.

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