The 6 types of punters you’re guaranteed to see at the Cheltenham Festival
Which one are you?
THE runners and riders are in.
Where do you sit in our definitive list of all the types of Cheltenham punters?
Join us for a trip to The Human Zoo
1 The Pro
Everyone knows how humidity variation affects their Cheltenham picks, right?
The Pro has done their homework, and they aren’t afraid to tell you about it. Meteorological patterns? Alright pal. Grass blade density? Right you are mate. Mud-to-worm coefficient? Why of course.
Christmas Day in the Pro household is spent studying the Cheltenham ante-post form.
Best keep your distance, though, when their big hope falls at the first.
2 The Tipster
A highly contagious character.
Some guy at their mate’s gym knows Colin Tizzard and apparently all the alarm clocks at the yard have broken but that’s good because all the horses will be nice and rested so lump on now yeah.
Everyone piles in and guess what? Falls at the first.
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The brilliant new app, which is free to download ahead of the Cheltenham Festival, features:
- Best Odds - our odds comparison tool keeps the bookies honest
- Predictor - rank the field by 18 different categories, such as weight, draw, career prize money and jockey wins
- Tips & news - get a steer from the best tipsters in the business in our news tab
3 The Steady Eddie
Fair play. Steady Eddie has a plan - and sticks to it.
It’s just that just blindly picking out the favourite every time is as boring as an afternoon in Arthur’s Bar with James Milner.
Imagine going through the card… and winning £2.60. Well done, pal.
4 The Beginner
Lives their life by the mantra KISS - keep it simple, stupid.
AKA The Man Who Knew Too Little.
Can be infuriating, of course, when somebody who thinks the tote is a canvas bag and not a centralised betting pool system.
But fair play to them. Every dog has their day.
5 The Dreamer
Wait. So if I put a quid on an accumulator that predicts every winner at Cheltenham I win… how much?
Stick a big number in front of The Dreamer and their knees start trembling.
This time next year Rodders… we’ll be millionaires.
6 The Star Gazer
Templegate? Nah. Matt Chapman? Not for me. Mystic Meg?
Now we’re talking my language.
Cosmic Chris looks to the stars when picking a Cheltenham bet. Get out the crystals, pore over the horoscopes and salute the star signs - when you’ve got the cosmos on your side you can’t help but win, right?
